It's a Baby's life!

My daughter was a few weeks old when a friend dropped in with her child and nanny. As my friend sat cooing to the baby, her nanny started chatting with me. Within a few minutes she asked me when I was planning a second baby. My pregnancy and delivery traumatized body actually shrunk away in horror from her words. I laughed and said I wasn't even sure if I would have a second baby! Before I knew it she had scooted near me and told me in no uncertain terms not to be foolish. According to her if I didn't have a second baby (read son) then who would I leave everything to? I didn't know whether to be shocked or amused but told her I would leave it to my daughter. I can still still see the look of horror on her face. She told me in no uncertain terms that daughters weren't supposed to be left anything to, they belonged to their husbands. When I asked her what if my second baby was also a girl she said so keep having till you produce a son. She apparently had 4 daughters and h...

The ringing of the phone cut into Aadya's concentration. She sighed in irritation, she so wanted to finish this portion of her thesis before Ankit came home from school. "Hello? Yes, this is Aadya. Oh hello, Mrs. Gupta. Really? Today? Oh wow. Yes, yes, of course we will be there. Give us a couple of hours please. Thank you!" Aadya hung up in a daze. It was happening. It had taken five long years but they had finally got a call. She couldn't believe it. With trembling hands she dialed her husband's number. "Sunil? Its me. We got the call. They want us to come as soon as possible. I'll ask Papa to pick up Ankit. How soon can you pick me up? Perfect. I'll be ready. " Sunil and Aadya were married since 2007. They had been blessed with a baby boy Ankit who was now seven years old. One of the main things that had cemented their relationship was their shared desire to adopt a baby girl. They both felt very strongly about issues of gender discrimination ...

It is believed that becoming a mother is one of the greatest joys a woman can experience. From a young age it is ingrained in us that a woman is incomplete unless she's a mother. We grow up hearing stories of how from the moment you see your baby, you are transformed. I became pregnant easily. My husband and I were only trying for a couple of months when I conceived. I considered myself lucky because we were both into our 30's and had been told it could take time. My pregnancy was not particularly uncomfortable; I continued working, kept up with my swimming, went for walks, drove around like I usually did. All in all, it seemed to me that I was well prepped for motherhood since everything was progressing so smoothly. The water broke, labor pains started and 11 hours later I was handed my daughter. My entire conscious existence had prepared me to fall in love with my baby at first sight. I was ready to experience all those wonderful feelings I had read about, seen in countless m...

I went to a kids’ birthday party a few days ago. Along with mountains of food there were the usual party games. I sat and watched while the kids ran around and played musical chairs amidst squeals of excitement. At the end of the game the winner proudly accepted her prize while we all clapped. However the next minute the child who lost was also given a prize much to my surprise. Later I asked the host why this was so and she replied that the child who lost shouldn’t feel bad. I walked away feeling dissatisfied with the whole event. As I was chatting with my five year old daughter later in the day I realized that this incident actually showed what was wrong with the current generation. We talk about how kids are growing up spoilt and with a sense of entitlement but aren’t we only responsible for this? In the attempt to prevent a child from feeling bad for losing in a game, what we are doing is telling the child that it’s okay to not make an effort to do better. While the child who’s won...

Someone once told me having one child makes you a parent but having two makes you a referee! What they forgot to mention was that having two kids also means four times the work. My elder one was 3.5 years when my younger child arrived. All of a sudden it seemed that there were never enough hours in a day. Schedules went haywire, routines got disturbed, nights and days seemed to melt into a blur of sleepless, exhausting hours. Does it get any easier? is a question friends who are contemplating a second child ask me. Yes, it does. But each new stage brings its own set of challenges. And there are two little beings who are growing up together, each reaching different milestones. So yes, it’s definitely a juggling act; one where you are perpetually scared of dropping the ball. That doesn’t mean you don’t opt for a second baby if that’s what you have planned for. It just means that you need to be well-prepared for the chaos that will follow for a couple of years. From experience, I can say ...

To the mom who loves her kids but longs for some time away from them. To the mom who's exhausted and hasn't slept well in weeks. To the mom who sometimes yells at her kids and then feels guilty for hours. To the mom who has forgotten what it's like to dress up and feel like a woman. To the mom who looks enviously at other moms seemingly managing better than her. To the mom who wants to remember what it was like to just be a wife. To the mom who wonders what she's doing with her life. To the mom who snaps at her husband because he just doesn't get it. To the mom who waits for the kids to sleep before indulging in a drink. To the mom who desperately wants a break from daily routine. To the mom who longs for a weekend of traveling solo. To the mom who wants to return to work, to continue a career she worked so hard to build. You are NOT a Failure. You are a human being, responsible for little beings. You are a person with wants and needs, just like everyone else. You a...

My first baby weaned off herself within a matter of days. So when I started breastfeeding my second baby, I was floating in a confident haze that weaning him would be no problem. Least did I know what lay ahead! There is no doubt that breastfeeding is a wonderfully rewarding experience, both for the mum and baby. But there comes a stage when you have just had enough. Unfortunately many times, your baby may not agree with you. Being a follower of gentle, baby-led weaning at 18 months I decided it was time to disengage my baby from my boob! However, my son seems to have inherited my stubborn genes and did now much like the idea. To begin with, I started dropping a day feed, since that seemed the easiest to do. I substituted this with cow milk and started telling my baby that "mama's milk was finished." The first time I said that he looked at me askance, as though his world had come to an end. After several hits and misses, we successfully reached an understanding where duri...